Not for myself, but for my children. I am pretty sure my guys won't have to worry about bullies- as they are confident, independant, smart,social and well-liked -but today, you never know. Kids get picked on for the silliest of things, and I know that it hasn't changed all that much from when I was a kid- but they've gotten even more cruel.
I am honestly, terrified of the idea of bullies. Mason is at the age now, where solid friendships are crucial in his development and wellbeing- and one nasty kid at this age, can set him up for the rest of his school career. Or I suppose on the other end of the spectrum, if my kid becomes the bully [which is sooooooooo unlikely as he has the heart of a lamb ] I read up about bullying on a regular basis, and I actually talk to my kids about it all the time. Almost everyday- we talk about what it means to be a good friend, why it's important to be a good friend, and what we do if we see that someone isn't being a good friend to someone, or if someone is picking on us. I try to make them understand with the "how do you think you'd feel.." aspect and I tell them that they will never get in trouble for telling the truth, and to never be afraid to reach out to an adult if they need to or if they need to protect a friend.
I was picked on as a kid. I was really skinny, I was smart- in everything but math- and I loved everything earthy. {oh , and I loved to wear pigtails all over my head....like....6 of them} that made me an easy target. The girls who would pick on me though, would pick on me one day and then the next day they were fighting over who was going to be my "best friend". talk about mixed messages!! I decided when I got to grade 8 though, when they all got mixed in with drugs [someone actually passed out in the bathroom from an acid trip.....in grade 8] that I didn't want/need to waste my time with them anymore. We went to the same highschool, and I pretended I didn't know any of them. I didn't just blow them off though- I full on told them why I didn't want to be friends with them, the gist of it was...they were MEAN.
When I see anti-bullying ads on tv, or videos like this on youtube and see it in the media [are you a Gleek?!] it really makes me terrified for my own kids...and cry a little bit. I 'm trying my hardest to raise super confident {but not cocky}, smart, outgoing, independant and quirky {they've got that part down !} kids. I also want them to be the ones who stand up for their friends too- not stand back and watch someone turn into a target.
Does the fact I'm thinking about it now, that my kids are under the age of 6 make me crazy? I don't think so- I think it's making me prepared. When I was picked on and bullied , nobody saw it. I told teachers, I told the principal, I told anyone who would listen....but they weren't really listening. I had itching powder put in my pants [while I was in gym class] , I had my clothes stolen [again...gym class], rumors were started about me, but they never layed a hand on me- and that was the only time a teacher would step in...if there was physical abuse.
So- I advocate for my kids and I will advocate for them as long as I'm needed. I ask a lot of questions at the end of a school day { who did you play with today ? Was everyone a good friend today? why did so-and-so go to the office today, what did the teacher say about that?, when so-and-so hit you with the rocking chair, how did that make you feel and what did the teacher do about it.....etc,etc,etc} and I'm sure my kids will be so sick of that, and never want to answer once they hit the age of 10, but I hope they always answer, so I can jump in if I need to....... and bust some knee-caps. ;-)
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